FRICK AND FRACK

I AM SOOOOOOOOOOOO ANGRY TODAY...I AM SHAKING.

JUST SPENT THE LAST OF MY SAVINGS ON MY TRUCK, AND DINGO AND I GOT INTO IT *sort of* on the phone....


GOING HOME NOW TO DRINK LOTS OF SHINER BLONDE.....

WILL BE CONTINUED IN DEPTH TOMORROW......

ok,.... today is a new day, and I am in a much better mood, letting the events of yesterday soak away.

My serptine belt broke as well, as a tensioner and pulley in my Montero. $600 later, I am just so mad because I had so many plans for that money, that I was crying and so upset yesterday. Today though, I am grateful that I had the extra money, and I am with a vehicle that is safe to drive. Yes, it sucks to spend that much money on your vehicle, but at least I had it to spend right?

My father called me yesterday from my attorney's office (they are buddies) to ask about the status of my truck. My attorney in the background, asked if I had heard from Ex, and I said, no I will call him today. This was around 9:30 in the morning. I called, and seems Mr. and Mrs. We are so busy at our thriving business, where not in yet, as well as not answering phone calls from their answering service. Couple of phone calls later, and I finally got, "Ex said he isn't in the office right now and he can't take your phone call."

What the hell difference does it make if he is in his "office" or not to take a personal phone call concerning me helping him with his child support arrears?????

One last phone call around 4:30, and Dingo gets on the phone superiorly huffy tone, and said, "Ex is in a conference with a woman and has been all day....he's gotten all your messages."

I say, "ok, well I need some info. 1st of all, did you get the fax of that page that my attorney sent that you requested?"

Dingo: "yes I did."

Me: "Ok, well you said that Ex would email, let me know what is going on and when he planned to send the papers, and I haven't gotten anything."

Dingo: " Well, Ex has gotten all your messages, and when he isn't busy, he'll get back to you."

grrrrrrrrrrrrr..... internal temperature rising.........


Me: "ok. well how about this, do you guys have a home phone number or cell? I'll call him back around 9 tonight, when we are both not busy." {I called their listed home number today, and it has been disconnected}

Dingo: "No! well, ...I mean , yes we have numbers but I am NOT giving them to you" in the snarkiest tone......

LAST FREAKING STRAW: BLOW UP IMMINENT

Me:" you do realize that he is court ordered, and it is a law, that I am provided with his current phone numbers???" ~~Me calling the 1800 number listed on their web site, only talking to the "answering service" is not working, since he isn't able to ever receive his calls.

Dingo: "Well, he's got your messages, if he wants you to know his numbers, he'll call you or email you whatever."

Me: "Ok...just a reminder, IT IS LAW."

AND I HUNG UP THE PHONE.

I was considering telling EX, that I would waive all arreages, yesterday, but after that little stunt. Option dropped. If Dingo thinks that she is big enough, and bad enough, and somewhat important enough to refuse to tell me a way to talk to the other parent of my child, then she can take time from her busy playing with her new puppy, and do the rest of everything, while the arrearages add right up.

As of this moment in time, I am done. I am done doing what should be their work.

As a matter of fact, a great friend of mine, went as far as to drive by their house yesterday (she lives 2 miles away), and as I suspected, it does NOT have a foreclosure sign out front.

So...if he has the ability to come up with quite a few thousand dollars to save the dump from foreclosure....he can come up with his back child support.

Last night, my father called again, to check on me and doodle, and the truck. He then told me he had been by the court house today, to pick up some paperwork, and found out the child support office had filed a "writ" against ex yesterday. I had no idea what that meant. So, I looked up the definition online today:

In law, a writ is a formal written order issued by a body with administrative or judicial jurisdiction. In modern usage, this public body is normally a court. Warrants, prerogative writs, and subpoenas are types of writs, but there are many others.

HOLY COW... HAHAHAHAHAH look at this one I just found!!!!

Writ of Execution
When a paying parent fails to make court-ordered support payments a writ of execution can be issued. A levying officer, usually the sheriff's office, serves the writ on the parent or person or company that is holding an asset of the parent - such as a bank account, retirement fund, inheritance, boat, rental property, etc. -- and takes control of the property. The paying parent has a short period of time after the property is seized to go to court to request the writ be quashed. The writ will only be quashed if the property seized is exempt from xecution, if the seizure was improper, or the debt was already paid. If the writ is not quashed and the property seized is cash or money in an account it will be turned over to the child support agency. If the property seized is not cash, it will be sold at auction and the money from the sale will be turned over to the child support agency.

To be fair... there are also writ's of with holding from paycheck etc, however, has many times declared that he doesn't receive income from the business that his wife owns. Yes, last April, the business went from:

• 80% EX
• 20% Wife

to

• 0% EX
• 100% Wife

So, technically, I have no idea what is going on...but it most certaintly can not be good on their part.

*sigh*

just wanting this to all be over.....

Prostitution As a Career

So , I never talk about anything in the news,but I am going to today. New York Governor Eliot Spitzer got caught as client #9 in a prostitution ring. He isn't the first, he isn't going to be the last. They say it is sinful. They say is spreads diseases. So is causal sex you aren't getting paid for. . . .

First and foremost, I would like to say, that I do not condone prostitution, I personally think it is a vial and filthy way for a woman to live her life. With that said, I think that is a woman so chooses to sell her intimate body parts and services as a career, shouldn't have any other person have the right to tell her to stop , it's her body.

Prostitution is actually one of the oldest professions in the world. At times, it has been celebrated, such as women in Asian cultures who are Geisha's, who were NOT originally or technically prostitutes, but they did have their client #9 or danna. Then there were the ever infamous courtesan's of the 16th century, and they were the lucky ones. Beautiful, taught to be intelligent, and be able to "carry on educated conversations with men" hmmm... is it really that hard? I guess what I am getting at, is at some point in time, prostitution became completely sinful. And I agree to a point. I think intimacy should be about love and passion, and commitment, but who of us haven't had a crazy romp in our lives???

This morning while driving to work, and listening to the radio, I couldn't help but think, "why not let these women, earn a living this way?"

Is is because, this is a career that men could truly not excel at? Yes, yes, I know that there are men prostitutes, but I don't know if they could hold their own in this particular market.

Is is because of women, who fear for their husbands paying to go astray??? I say if your husband is going to be vile enough to sleep with a hooker, divorce his ass, because he doesn't deserve you, your commitment, and loyalty to your marriage anyway.

Hustler and Playboy models make boocoos of money off of showing every crease and cranny they have to the public, why isn't that against the law? Porn is one the biggest industry's alive today, if selling your body for sex, should be illegal, well there is plenty of visual evidence to start throwing all these horrific offenders in the jail house along with all the other murderers, rapists, and other despicable outlaws.

I guess, what I am trying to get at is this: If someone wants to sell you her va-jay-jay for a career, (sooo many of them do behind closed doors in offices, government, anywhere you can excel anyway), I say let them.



If you are old enough to make enough money to pay to have sex with a woman who has seen more penis's than your local urologist, then your old enough to know to wear a condom, and do what is appropriate to prevent the possible spread of diseases.

I know that this is a weird and unusual post, but I can't help but think it.

What do you think?

(oh and by the way....for anyone who is keeping track --- still no cokes and 134.5 lbs this morning!)

My New Office "Chair"

So...I caught an article ( http://www.gearfire.net/10-reasons-to-use-an-exercise-ball-as-your-chair/ )that peeked my interest, Here is the basis of it:

1. Forces proper spine alignment. Because an exercise ball is not stable, your body needs to try to balance itself on it. The perfect spinal posture is coincidently the easiest to balance with. Thus, your body will automatically try to align itself into the proper posture. This helps improve your spinal health, and decrease back pains.

2. Causes you to frequently change positions. An exercise ball causes to you to change your position often to balance. For example, if you turn 45 degrees to face the phone, your body will assume a new position. This helps reduce damage caused by prolonged sitting in the same position.

3. Fitness is at your fingertips. Another great thing about using this alternative to a chair, is that you can do stretches or mini-workouts whenever you want, without getting up. If you’ve ever stuck waiting for a minute or two, you can make productive use of that time with a quick workout or stretch. Because it’s much more convenient, you will probably do it more, thus resulting in better health.

4. Improve your balance. This one is very understandable. Sitting on an unstable surface all day will improve your sense of balance, as well as the reactions of your muscles. The result? An overall better balance, that can be observed out of the office.

5. Get that 6-pack you’ve been wanting. Your body primarily uses your core (abdominal) muscles to help compensate for changes in balance. Thus, your essentially getting a low-key abdominal workout. This may not sound like a lot, but consider the amount of time you spend on your computer at the office, or at home. Those hours can build up, and result in a strengthening of ab muscles.

6. Improves your circulation. Using an exercise ball will keep the blood flowing to all parts of your body, throughout the day. A desk chair on the other hand, reduces circulation to some parts of the body after prolonged use.

7. You’ll feel more energetic. It has been proven that staying in one position, will make you more tired, while moving around and being active with give you more energy. With an exercise ball as a chair, you will feel much more energized after you finish your work.

8. Burn up to 350 calories per day. More movement during the day = more calories burnt. Burning 350 calories per day = losing one pound of fat every 10 days. You may not burn quite 350, but nonetheless, it will help you stay it.

9. Really cheap. Specialized exercise balls designed for sitting usage can range from $15 to $80. Much cheaper than buying an ergonomic chair, which can range anywhere from $100 to $400 and up.

10. C’mon, its fun! Who doesn’t like the idea of bouncing around on an exercise ball all day. Exercise balls are an exciting alternative to chairs, and may just give that spark of fun to your day.

Now you should know that since being a nurse, I have suffered from back pain, but since I have taken this office nurse job, it is sometimes completely intorlerable. I attribute it from sitting at this desk all of most days.

So, I went to Marshall's on my lunch break and found this for $9.99. I am sitting on it as we speak, and I can feel my stomach muscles hard at work. Plus its fun to roll back and forth so far.

It isn't easy for someone who slouches as much as I do, but I am looking forward to working through the initial pain, to see if it really is worth the effort.

My secretary is laughing at me......

Intervention

ok, so I am kind of "addicted" to Intervention on A&E. http://www.aetv.com/intervention/ Which is kind of ironic, since the show is about addicts. Anyway, last night was about a sorority girl who was bulimic. She got kicked out of her sorority house because of a binge where she ate 70 girls month of food in 2 weeks, and naturally threw it all up.





Boyfriend and I was watching, he because I think it just baffled him, me because I was bulimic for about 5 1/2 years. I was never as bad as this girl. Just watching everything she ate made me feel physically ill. I never binged. I would just eat, feel full, cause I was a member of the "clean plate club" growing up, and then throw it up. Boyfriend was amazed when this girl's brother said, they had once taken 30lbs of vomit out of her room. Now I find that disgusting, but I had to explain to boyfriend, when I was still at home in highschool, my mom had pretty much quit cooking dinner, and we ate McDonald's or Sonic everynight. So, I would grab a plastic Wal-Mart bag, be in my room, throw it up, and when I could, take it outside to our trash can. I hide my bulimia from everyone. No one knew it. And thankfully, I guess it wasn't that bad, because I was still always a tad overweight, and never got super skinny from it. But last night I understood the girl, what she was feeling, when she said, "I may never be cool with food."





I still have issues with food and eating, and my body. There was a small period of time, that I liked my weight, but unfortunately, I was there because I was doing other things, that I shouldn't have been doing. They were at first, like any other college kid, an experimentation. But my reward was, I was finally losing weight that I had fought a battle my whole life to lose. I went from my normal 145+lbs, down to 120 in about a month. I was STOKED! I was never 'hungry', and my goodness, I went from a size 7/8 or 9 down to a 4, then later down to a 2.





At rock bottom, was when Ex and I broke up. I had always vowed never to do certain things. But he broke up with me for an ex-girlfriend whose name rhymed with Coke Slut, and so that is what we called her "Her Name-The Coke Slut".





Andy (remember him) came to my apartment one day and saw me in shambles, and ushered me to go somewhere for spring break. Just so happened that my best friend from High School and some of her friends were going to New Orleans, so I tagges along. It was there I decided to give a certain something a try..... we did it all week.





I moved to Houston the next week, where for a few months, our experimentation lead us to something more expensive, and definitely more productive in the weight loss department. I'll never say I was addicted. But I did "it" damn near everyday for months. I never had to pay for it. Andy always gave me plenty, so there it always was. When it ran out, we got more. At the height of this affair, I was playing with about 110, 109 lbs. I loved it. THAT, was what I was addicted to, the weight loss. The size 0-2 clothes. After Larry and I got back together, we 'partied' a little, but since we got engaged and were getting married, I didn't want that life, it didn't fit me, before it was a way to null my heartbreak, and my fear of being overweight. So I stopped, for me it wasn't hard to do really. There were 2 times I wanted to and did, because, well, I 'm not going to lie, it's fun. But then, I finally grew tired and didn't want to do those things at all, however, he always pushed me into it at the end of our 'relationship' a few more than a couple of times, then I found out I was pregnant (I hadn't done anything in over a month), and stopped, cold turkey without looking back. Not to mention, he 'partied' alot while I thought we were both not doing anything like that, which is how I realized all his money was gone, thanks to stippers, and drugs.





I guess watching this girl on tv last night just brought up alot of old memories, and truths. I am freaked out about gaining anymore weight. And before anyone asks, no, I don't nor will I ever use drugs anymore, but I would be lying, if I said I am never trying to figure anything else out that would work. I would be lying if I didn't think about throwing up sometimes. If someone were to show me a pill that wasn't a narcotic, that wouldn't destroy my heart, kidneys, or liver, that would make me lose weight have that kind of energy again, I'd buy it bulk.








This is me, today, my God, you can tell I am a slouch at the computer by the wrinkles on my scrubs. Am I fat? Not really. My scrub shirt that is way old, could be a little bigger. I think my shoulders are too broad, my arms are flabby and could use some super duper toning. My belly, could use alot, as well as my back. These are just the things that go through someone heads that has an "overcritical image of themselves." I am not going to say I have a disorder, but I think way too much, and thankfully I am intelligent, and educated enough to know better than do something stupid, like throwing up again, or anything else that will harm my body.

By the way , this was the haircut I was going for, not exactly what I got. But it can grow out right?

I don't even know why I am blogging about this, I guess, I just feel bad for the girl. I understood her addiction. Hell, I am still addicted to the scales. I weighed 136lbs today, so I guess I got rid of that extra pound, but am I any happier? No. In my head, I will keep saying the same thing I have said to myself for as long as I can remember, "Not good enough."

I guess it is this type of addiction, you can't really get over, you just deal with it. I am absolutely terrified of having another baby, because I am afraid of gaining weight. I am now 16lbs heavier than I was when I got pregnant with Doodlebug. In my head, it is a MUST, a prerequisite if you will for me to drop at least 10lbs and maintain before I ever entertain the idea of getting pregnant. *The mad ramblings of woman fixated on her weight right?* But those are the little thoughts that run wild through my head.

Right now, I am depressed because I can't seem to lose weight. Boyfriend is adding me to his gym membership so that will help, but I can't help but wonder, will I really feel better about my appearance, or will be just something else to hide the fear I have of gaining weight?????

How can 1 lb irritate you so badly?

OK, so I am on a mission....to lose 10 lbs by may 2008. Last week, I stopped drinking sodas. It's officially been 4 days now, (with the exception for a few sips on a diet coke yesterday, and I literally mean like 4). I would have thought there would have been at least a pound, one little single pound shed by that! Nope, I gained one. And I worked like a mad women this weekend.


Friday night was "Date Night" for boyfriend and I. There is a really neat art studio in town that was having a parent's night out from 5:30-9, for $15.00 + bring a meal, so I signed Doodlebug up . I even drove him by there that morning to look at it and things of that nature so it wouldn't be that big of a shock to him. I never just drop him off with anyone, and I was a little apprehensive about it, but a mom I met through a meet up group I joined at meetups.com suggested it, so I thought I would give it a whirl. As soon as I picked him up from school, he was ready to go to Picasso's Place. I drove him through McDonald's for nuggest, apple slices and chocolate milk. I observed 2 other vehicles in front of me singlely getting happy meals as well, as we all pulled out, going to the same place :). I thought he might hug my leg, until he warmed up, but like a duck in water, he was off, rolling play-dough into snakes with other children.


Boyfriend and I spent the entire rest of our night at Outback, mostly at the bar waiting for a table, while drinking 22oz beer, and another on the way to our table...(ah ha....that is probably where that lb came from !). Anyway, then we got into a stupid fight, which I may detail later. I just sent an email to a friend from high school, to see if she can back up my part of the fight, and if she has the right answer, I'll write more about it. But needless to say, that twin over full bunk came in handy , because that was were I slept friday night....I showed him....whatever, that thing was so uncomfortable, I put a feather bed on it yesterday. How many 3 year olds do you know that own two beds? One with a goose down featherbed, and the upper twin that has egg crates??? He's rotten.



Then we spent saturday, diving into our boxes of messes. Throwing some stuff to the trash, some stuff the garage sale pile, others to the put back in the plastic totes (as my mother calls them) and up in the attic. Which was another huge fiasco. We had to make another trip to lowes because boyfriend who has searched the attic when we first moved in for critters, said we needed ply wood, to put across the rafters so we could make solid places for our boxes. Ok, I felt it ok to spend the money on that, so I bought two huge pieces of plywood at $34. We got home, and guess what is up in the attic?

1. Enough ply wood, that we make a few places to place our storage containers.



2. A little furry rat, whom I now call Ralphy, who made my boyfriend jump and almost squeal too cute.

So, I am not sure what he and his brother did for like an hour and a half that night in the attic, but there is a critter....and there is plywood. I'm taking what we bought back, one sheet of it anyway, boyfriend wants to make a sturdier door from the other sheet for the shed outside, I can't wait to see how this turns out *rolling eyes, with a massive inspiration*.



.


Then, yesterday, we got rid of my beast of a king size mattress, FINALLY. My parents gave it to me, when I got my first apartment, that was mine alone, back in 2001. They had first gotten it back when my niece was a baby, and she will be 20 this year. So, ick... it was in need of being chunked! Then we (I) took some stuff to my brother's for our combo garage sale. And last, I started tackling some of the decorations for doodle's room. I am still not finished, and I have to say that the bunk takes up sooooooooo much room!!! But we turned it around, and put cork board up behind the headboards, and are planning to add some tiki-skirting under the cork boards to make little curtains, so just imagine along with me.


















The moon light that you see, it really cool! I got it at Ikea, but is just darling when it's lit up in a dark room. I also got him a second one that is a blue star just to the left of his bed. He loves to sing "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star", whenever he turns them on at night. I have the matching twin quilt now in the mail too. I had too. So much for my savings account, right??


He came home with two paintings from Picasso's Place, so I tacked them onto his top twin board.






















Here is a sort of different angle. Yes, he is 3, still loves his blankie and still sucks his thumb when we are not reminding him not to. I wish I would have closed the blinds sooner, or at least before taking the pictures! I am thinking that I want to make a red and white stripped curtain for his window, but can't decided for sure. What do you think? Leave the blinds? make a curtain? Any suggestions about the room at all are definitely appreciated! And I have to say , I love his bed. I think I made a great purchase here! It's much sturdier than the metal one for sure! Little monkeys...jump on the bed.....


This is actually a neat picture, you can see my little starfish now that are painted and not just wood anymore! They were suppose to be Texas stars, but I painted the outside white, the inside yellow, and left the star the natural wood color so it would look more like a starfish.





















I also found 2 really cool posters from www. allposters.com for his room! Boyfriend, donated a pretty shirt from a Ron Jon Surf shop for me to do something creative with, it's on his red oversized anywhere chair.



















For right now, I have his TV on a plastic set of drawers, it works, for now at least. When I was a teen (and now too I guess) I have always been a hopeless beach lover. I even went through my surfer (if you can call it that on Texas waves) phase. To commerate all things Holy in the land of Surf and Turf, I found this super cool, tin Endless Summer Poster, as well as beachy wall stickers from Target, and I stole boyfriend Tiki Torches, that used to be on his apartment balcony.






















Ok, so I messed up on my pictures here, but that's ok :) This was the other picture poster I got. It is just really pretty and colorful, but there is a big glare on it, but I think you can somewhat make it out. The palm tress and the surf boards are complementary of a kit I got at Target for about $15.00.





















I also got the live to surf board at Target, and the cutie hula girl and hut picture is one that boyfriend had at his apartment, I think in his kitchen, but I can't remember. And last but not least, I still haven't tackled the monster of the nook where his bookshelf currently resides piled with toys, boys, those cute to be put up toy holders I bought at Ikea too.... There will be toys to be sold at the garage sale.....I can't wait.









So that was the majority of my weekend.





This week is going to be a monster. Already work has been tough. I started this at about 8:30 this morning, and right now I am eating my lean cuisine pizza and drinking water....dying for a coke though!





I really want to get back into shape. Yesterday while Doodle was sleeping and I was tying myself into knots to get the featherbed on his bunk, I was watchign bulging brides, and kept wondering about the fact, that if THEY can do it in 6 weeks, I should be able to as well....




Let the count down begin.




Weighed today: 137lbs. Not happy about that at all......
36 inches at bust (with padded bra...sad I know)
30 inches at waist, although boyfriend and I argue about where that is. I say it's where I curve in between my ribs and my hips. He says that is my ribs. He think my waist is where the "waistband of your jeans or underwear sit"...I think he doesn't understand the term "hip-huggers". . . .
37 big ol inches at my butt.....







ok...I'm super sad now...........

What to Think About When....

When you have absolutely nothing and absolutely everything to think about???




For one, I am restudying my Nursing 4 exam (yawn) <~ but I guess I shouldn't be yawning if I failed it with a D last time right? I am thinking about all the boxes that still need unpacking......and all the stuff that needs to be done around the house..... I am trying really really hard not to think about the EX, and why those damed papers haven't made it to my attorney yet. And yes... I have done it again, which means her myspace reads:

Dingo is hoping my baby gets me a new puppy this week!!!

Really? Last time I knew, having a new puppy isn't cheap, and they already have a dog, that can't be more than 3-4 years old. Ugh.




I am looking for a new job, and interviewed for one I fell in love with yesterday and hoping it goes well.




I'm actually on the phone with the AG and they are soooooo ridiculous and won't tell me anything, because I have an attorney, then...they won't even transfer me to my case worker who knows it's ok to talk to me since my attorney gave them permission! This is so frustrating.




I just want to know if EX or Dingo have spoken with them at all about our 'arrangement'.




oh wait some has got on the line!




Oh yeah baby, and now she's transferring me to the attorney for the AG who handles my case!!




****** holding ******




Ok, so, I do believe in the best interest of ridding myself of everything. I am going to agree to release everything. The attorney said, all my attorney needs to do, is to set a court date, I am going to ask for either March 21 (Good Friday & I am off of work that day!) or March 24th. Show up to court, finalize the termination, me sign the judgment and release, and it will all be over with!!!




I know that actually have a little extra money in hand could have been nice. But what can be nicer, starting where I can finally stop worrying about all of this. I know it won't happen over night. But I have all the faith in the world that it will happen.





Do I just bucked it up and called Ex....Dingo got on the phone, HEAVEN FORBID EX TALK TO ME DIRECTLY :)) Lord help the two of them, because I dare not believe that they can help themselves.




She said, he hasn't sent them yet, because she notarized them for him, and well his father (who is an attorney) didn't think that was ok. So she needs my attorney to resend them. Seems Ex is asking his father for help drawing up the agreement we had. Great if it works, if not, I'll still release it.




So I just faxed a little note to my attorney...hoping he is out of court soon so we can talk.

I believe I need a reboost

I have come to realize, that I am zapped of any energy all the time.


I sat waiting at the hospital with my dad yesterday for him to be called in for a colonoscopy, and right there, in public, something I have never done, I feel asleep. Not to mention, went to bed at a decent hour, slept in, but man....I felt so tired and sleepy, layed my head back...and jumped up 10 maybe 15 minutes later when they opened the door to call a patient back.


Boyfriend is entirely 'frustrated' with me because, I never, and I mean never, have the interest in anything at night, other than sleeping. I used to like mornings, but not even that anymore. I feel exhausted all the time. I feel sleepy all the time.


I feel bad for Boyfriend, because although we've had a few arguments here and there over my lack luster zeal for passion on the sheets, he's been extremly patient with me. I want to have more energy for these things, but don't have a clue where to find it. I read all these other single mom's blogs, about dating and their sex life, and I can't help but wonder where, and how do they find the energy and 'want-to' for it?

I love boyfriend, I am very attracted to boyfriend, but I just want to sleep all the time. As soon as a few things die down some, I really want to start exercising again. I know everyone says, exercising, helps boost energy. As I was perusing the web today, I found this article:

http://http//health.discovery.com/centers/sex/articles/romancetips.html

I really liked what it said here:

"Take time for yourself every day. While this can be tough with hectic schedules, jobs and kids, even 10 to 15 minutes a day can help reduce your stress and give you more energy for your partner. What's more, says Laura, "it's really hard to go out and go bungee jumping if you've neglected your own life. It's important to keep your own energy going. The more connected to who you are, the less you get lost in the daily grind, which pulls you away from your partner. And the more sensual and the more connected to yourself you are, the more available you are for your partner. I think it's really tough when one partner stays really connected with themselves and the other is still lost. Both partners really need to make a commitment to do that."

There is where my biggest fault is. I don't really ever have time to myself. I have tried like a bazillion times, to tell boyfriend, I don't like talking on the phone on my way to work or on the way home (the only alone time I really have). He takes it personally, thinking I don't want to talk to him, which isn't necessarily always true. Yes sometimes I call people I haven't talked to in a while or something like that, but with them, I am talking, not just sitting on the phone in silence with nothing to really talk about. His defense, he just wants to be on the phone with me, doesn't matter if we have anything to talk about, I however, find that annoying.

I don't really know where to start compromising with him.


If anyone is reading this, and you have any tips, suggestions, comments, PLEASE SHARE!